Holiday Addition

Shelby Angel will be staying with us for a while as we search for her forever home.  Her feet are doing well and she has finished her first round of heartworm treatment.    

Obviously she is fitting in just fine.  All of the dogs helped me read Eaters of the Dead by Michael Crichton today, a fine holiday book if I may say so (lol:).   

  

  

Dear Santa, I've Been Good!

The front runners:
Jack LaLanne! ha ha!!! Dave must have bought this after he saw me watch that infomercial. He said I have been talking about getting a juicer for a while now, and since I actually do use the fruit dehydrator I got last year for Christmas, he figured he would risk getting me another kitchen appliance.  

(Is it weird, though, when your spouse starts buying you kitchen appliances for Christmas?)

An underwater video/camera!!!!!  Yes!!!!!  Now I can really record my horrible swim in all of its glory!
A gift card to Outdoors...yes!  My mom is finally coming around!!! (she did get me a Barbie Christmas ornament to go with the gift card- some things never change)

Vibram 5 Fingers- everyone made fun of me for wanting these and said they look silly.  I am going to do some running in them though!  I am all about doing new things this year.  

A running metronome- time to really make sure I am keeping that 180....
And real Brees jersey!!!  I guess I can stop wearing my Brooks jersey now.  

No new bike under the tree (ahem...) Julia (GoBigGreen').

Yea Christmas!  Everyone said I made out like a bandit this year.  And I agree!!!!!!!  Santa must have known that I have been really, really good this year.  :))))))))  

The Mid Week Round-Up

It is way past my bedtime...I am so tired but I have so much to do this week!!!  I am sure everyone feels this way.  

I am really excited for Christmas this year, despite my fatigue.  For one, the Saints have a winning record.  

And two, I am now running 5 minutes at a time up to 25 minutes total running with walk breaks.  I am all about form and more form right now.  I am running 3 days a week which is exciting!

I also went on my second mountain bike ride ever on Sunday- first mtn bike ride post surgery. Dave grumbled that I shouldn't be on riding a mountain bike right now, but luckily I only went straight over the front of the handlebars once.  The other time I fell to the side and it only felt like I broke my wrist.  Sheesh!  Mountain biking is dangerous, but fun!   

Swimming is swimming, and I am steadily working on getting back to where I was this summer.  I also found a great deal on my speedo women's vanquisher goggles at TJ Maxx tonight for $5.99- so I bought 5 pair.  Can't beat that!

And Shelby Angel is spending a few weeks with us.  This is not a picture of her, but rather a picture of Rooney the Thief on Shelby's bed.  

This will be a full, and good week.  

Checking In

- Dave and I have tickets to see the Saint's first divisional playoff game at the Superdome.  oh yeah!!!!!

- I am jogging 4 minutes now.  It mostly feels fine.  Except on the treadmill, which is why I am severing my relationship with the treadmill forever.   

- Because, I would like for someone to explain to me how a treadmill is considered a "soft surface."  Please show me that research.  Explain to me how a very thin rubber mat, covering a hunk of metal is soft.  I really will listen, but I am quite sure I need to see the research now to continue holding on to this widely held belief.  

-  I have been drinking Juven lately- the same protein drink the residents in the nursing home drink to help wound healing, etc.  I love it!  It "helps you feel strong and remain active and independent."  Dave took one look at it and said..."isn't that for geriatric people?"  Why yes it is.  And I think I qualify.  

-  I still can't kick my cold/sinus infection.  I took a Z-pack.  I take the vitamins.  I just drank some Emergen-C.  I hate the winter.  I must move further south at some point in my life.  

- I just watched an infomercial for a Jack Lelanne juicer and I totally want one.  

-Rooney, Cayenne, and I have become so nonchalant about Dave's rules that we dared to go to sleep together on the bed last night before Dave came home.  When Dave walked in the house, neither dog greeted him at the door.  Neither dog was waiting at his/her post to guard the house.  Neither dog even bothered to get up from the bed and even pretend to feel guilty when he walked through the bedroom door.  Nope, we just all stayed in bed in defiance with our eyes closed.  Dave was sooooooooooo mad.  

-  Today I was treating a patient that has diabetes, and the nurse came to check her blood sugar.  It was really low, so the nurse suggested she eat one of her peppermint candies OR eat a slice of cake nearby to bring her blood sugar up.  What is wrong with this picture, people?  

- We are half way through the week! :)  

Warming Up To The Holidays

Let the holidays begin!  My favorite part about the Christmas season is seeing good, old, and even lost friends.  I try to rebel every year against Christmas (the commercialization and pressure to "buy things"), but I usually come out of my Grinchy shell a little bit when I have the chance to enjoy friends during the holidays.  Tonight I had the chance to social butterfly my way to three different parties.  

Party # 1- Frommage Fest 2009.  Wine and cheese...my favorite.  And boy, I haven't seen these girls in soooooo long!!!!  Good friends are meant to be seen often.  
Why does Laura always have to wear 6 inch heels to parties? ;)

Party #2- Some high school friends (my more studious friends....).  They could recall specific classroom incidents with tests and teachers.  Two of my friends could even regurgitate some long Latin paragraph they said we had to learn.  It was scary...I mean, that was 16 years ago!  Some things never change.   

And Party #3- more high school friends (my less studious friends!!!!)  We didn't have time to study our Latin in high school because we were too busy chasing boys!   :))))

I am looking forward to party hopping a little more next week as well.  

I somehow managed to catch a bug or cold or something from one of you on the internet- concluded by the fact that no one at work is sick, but I have heard grumblings hear and there from a few of you. So, here I am- 7:30 pm- ready for bed- drinking hot tea and honey and going through roll after roll of toilet paper.

As if I have real Kleenex at my house. You know I would never think to spend my money on that when I can blow snot rockets, use my sleeve, etc...

I did have some good mental highlights within the past few days. I read a really good Alan Smith interview this weekend about his sickening, devastating injury from a few years back (which robbed him of his best playing years) and how happy he is to still be playing, even at a lower level. The article gave me a bigger perspective on my measly injury. I would link some of the articles to you guys, but I know none of you care one bit about Alan Smith or premiership soccer. He is cute to look at, though. Soccer guys are my fave.

I also spent 2 hours at PT today (yes, 2...). I have a great PT/friend/fellow triathlete, Ashley, that really helps me use my own knowledge combined with her vast experience to figure things out. Tonight we decided to analyze my run a little bit since I have had some pain the past week and the emergence of other small problems.

We had a few hearty laughs at the fact that my knees were rubbing together when I ran. It could be the now 5 extra pounds I carry, but it is more likely some severe internal rotation from hip weakness. I have so much to focus on right now with strengthening and FORM! Injury + weakness = terrible form ->more injuries. So, we are sticking to super small runs with form focus.

And I wanted to lose those 5 pounds, but I ate pizza tonight instead. Tomorrow.

Again and Again

Do or do not- there is no try.  

Never, ever give up.  

The post-injury recovery is pretty tough mentally, as well as physically.  This has been my first week of pain and doubt (I am 5 weeks post sx).  I am working hard to get back into the swing of things, and I am having to challenge my mind to stay on top of the recovery as well.    

It just hit me yesterday how hard the process it- the recovery, the doubt, the work that I will have to do.  I freaked out in swim on Friday, it was just such a bad, bad swim.  I have been back to 5 master's practices, and I am just not ready for IM sets for time or for back to back hard swim classes.  My knee is not ready, I am not ready.  I was so hard on myself that day.  But, today is a new day and I am eager to get in the pool tomorrow and do the best that I can.  I have to be willing to do it again.  

Today I rode my bike for 45 minutes...at a 15mph average.  So, basically I am where I was when I first rode my bike 4 years ago.  Ughh, huh?  I know you feel my pain.  I came home mad and sad.  But, it is all part of the process- and poof, I will back on the bike tomorrow to try to figure it out.  What is it going to take?  What do I need to do?  When you lose control over the input=output, all you can do it work hard every day, regardless of the outcome.  

Of course the hardest has been the running.  1 minute 30 seconds is my limit right now.  Painful...??? not really painful.  Right???  no, not right.  Yet.  I hope.  So it is really about hope.  You know, if I tore my ACL in soccer, they would repair it and I would be running/playing again.  But my injury is a little more convoluted, it is a guessing game with no guarantees.  How do I fight that?  

By guaranteeing myself that I will work as much as I can on it and not focus on the future or outcomes I cannot control. 

So right now I cannot even think about racing.  I can't set goals like that.  I am setting goals to do my strength training, eat my vegetables, do something daily that will help me get fit, ride my bike no matter what the mph says, have gratitude for any amount of running I accomplish, and be willing to face weakness as many days/months/years as it takes to continue the journey.    

And like Kevin Leathers told me not too long ago (which I think about often because it is comforting)- he is still PRing in his 60s.  Just kidding, he is PRing at 45.  And he is a fellow soccer player, so I will actually listen to him.  

And just to stay competitive at something, I think I was the first bridesmaid to order both my dress and buy my shoes for Joy's wedding.  Go me!    

No Pictures?

I love going back to New Orleans:)


I took my camera to New Orleans for Thanksgiving, then realized I didn't have a memory card. Shoot!  

I had a great week.  I feel good and rested, as I should since I slept about 11 hours per night and had to force myself up every day.  The week went a little something like this:

Kyoto

Creole Creamery

Bryston's

St Joe's Bar

Rocky's Pizza

Prytania for The Blind Side

Dirty Coast, Storyville, and Magazine Street Shopping

Black and Gold Store

Mosca's

New Orleans Daquiris' x 2

PJs

CCs

Gluttony to the max!

I brought back 10 pounds of big shrimp, fresh off of the boat- at $2.50 a pound fresh, I dare you to find better food anywhere in the US.  It must be my turn to host a dinner party.  

The city is alive with Saints magic!  I am sad to say I have not seen a game since Hurricane Katrina, and at $900 a pop (yes, that is the current going rate for a seat at tomorrow's game) I guess I will not be seeing them play this year.  I also don't think I can upgrade my Aaron Brooks jersey to Drew Brees, as the kid's jerseys were $55 each, and I am just too thrifty to pay for the inflation that comes along with a winning season.  

So maybe I will get a WWBD shirt instead.  

5th Annual Turpin Turkey Trot

The Turpin family tradition continues- although we didn't squeeze in as many miles today as the Robert's household seemed to be full of whiners

-Damie:  my knee might swell

-Dave:  my groin hurts

-Cayenne:  but I have stitches in my foot

The Official Turpin Turkey Trot Crew- minus Papa taking the picture

No, the t-shirt over the tracksuit is not flattering, I know.  

And, I get to run this week...I get to run this week...yippeee!!!!!!

Knee Update- So Far So Good

I find it funny that I didn't realize how tired I would be after a day of work as a physical therapist.  What part of "physical" did I not understand?  I am doing well generally and learning the ins and outs of the job.  And since I am no spring chicken, I am learning to deal with the fatigue of WORK!  chuckle amongst yourselves as you figured it out a long time ago....

The knee is doing really well.  I am squatting, lunging, and spinning for 30 minutes amongst other things.  Pain free :)  It looks like I will be able to start running over Thanksgiving (small 30 second intervals) and I am really looking forward to it.  Too bad the 5th Annual Turpin Turkey Trot is happening early this year and I won't be able to showcase my 30 second run for the family. 

Other than that, I can't believe it is only Wednesday.  Ughhh.   I love the weekends.       

Evolution

We are not finished, but the new kitchen is underway.
Here is a glimpse at the old kitchen- unfortunately it is too hard to see the crappy, crappy 30 year old metal cabinets that are rusted, the washer that leaks, the mismatched sink cabinet, etc...It was embarrassing having friends over because the kitchen was so nasty.  It was not just ugly, it was gross- rust, 20 year-old-dirt, and food in crevices that could not be reached.

Dave and I decided to replace the cabinets and pain them all to match.  We were also going to paint the kitchen, baseboards, and window sills.  All of our appliances work just fine, so we weren't going to change up anything else.  

Phase One-

So, I literally came home from work on Tuesday, and the kitchen was gutted.  Mind you, I had no clue this was happening.  I just left the boys alone and the cabinet replacement turned into a full kitchen remodel.  I think this is because the boys don't balance the checkbook, do they?  

But, notice the nasty wall the had rot in it where the old sink was, etc....   It really did need more work than we originally realized.  

Phase two- 

The kitchen has a new wall to replace the area by the sink, and the walls have been primed.

Phase three-

Most of the cabinets are in as well as the countertops.  There are a lot of new appliances to go with the new look.  We still need to put all of the trim on the cabinets and countertops, paint the walls, complete the tile backsplash, and put in all of the appliances.  

We still have quite a bit of work today, but I plan on having a party as soon as it is done.  I can't decide if I should have a recipe exchange with the girls (since I have no excuse for not cooking now)- OR- turn the recipe exchange into a recipe exchange for Joy as bride-to-be -OR- just invite everyone over for dinner and wine.  

I am leaning towards all girls, recipes, and party for Joy.  

While the boys did electrical, plumbing, and saw work, here is what I did with my morning.

I lifted 200 pounds of aluminum cans into the truck and recycled them for $84.  (24$ to the humane society, and $60 to Hearts of Gold Pit Rescue is the plan).  I guess my knee is fine since I was doing squat-lifts with 30 pounds or so.   Oops- not fine, it is swollen.  Time to slow down. 

Gutting It Out

Another big congratulations to a Florida Ironman Finisher- Chris (tri-ing fat man- although I think the name should change to tri-ing Ironman!).  

You can read about Chris by licking on the link above, or look to the left under my motivational blogger section.  Chris has an awesome story and really embodies the spirit of athletics and competition- as we know, the competition is truly with ourselves.  

So Chris gutted it out-

and now I am gutting it out too.  

This used to be my kitchen.  

Wanting For Nothing

Because I already have all that I need....

Nothing like a Saints win to end the night, along with the animals all coming to get their night-night kisses.  

Lots of prayers for my puppy Cayenne, whose amputation is infected again, that everything will be solved tomorrow at the vet with no more cutting or loss.  

Love Ironman :)

I am enjoying the evening checking up on friends doing Ironman Florida.  (not loving the LSU loss as much...)  

I find that when I track friends doing an Ironman, I get so pumped up to race again.  I want to sign up for an Ironman ASAP- know the feeling?  

The IMFL drafting reports are already out there, though.  And that is one thing about that race that really turns me off- the reason I may never do that course again.  I remember- vividly- literally my heart rate is elevated thinking about it- the drafting.  I remember seeing people I know fly by me in packs.  It sure is easy to hold a pace 1-2 mph faster with a pack than on your own. Grrrr!  I had to work hard to keep my focus inward instead of wasting energy on losers.  And there were sooooo many losers!  Ughhh!!!!  Cheating sucks.  So, Joy, to answer your question- nope, won't do Florida again.  I just remembered why.  

But, anyways,  back to the good stuff.  Daniela Kruse (blogger) and my friend Kat Grifo (college teamie) look like they are both on there way to a finish- yea!!!!!  I hope they are enjoying every step of their marathon and taking it all in- that first Ironman finish.  Congratulations!

And I am just sitting around thinking...which IM next????    :))))))))

 

One Week Out

...And I have upgraded my day to fixing my own food, driving myself to PT, and standing up at candle light vigils for abused animals.  If you have not read about the horrific conditions in Memphis and want to, here is the link.  Warning- graphic, awful picture.  I think I officially hate Memphis now, but I am not sure how New Orleans is any better.  I think I need to move out West and live off of the land, but unfortunately Dave is such a weenie and has to live by a big city lest he become bored.   

So I felt good enough to convince Laura to ditch running with Joy and come protest with me instead.  That is what you do when you are out of shape and can't do anything- you sabotage your friend's workouts too and convince them it is the "off-season".  Oh- she didn't mind.  It was fun!  We felt like hippies in the new century- except I was wearing my triathlon Los Locos jacket.  And, someone asked us if we were with the college, which made my day at 31-years-young!  This morning I found out the shelter director did get fired- great- but what ignorant POS are they going to put in charge now?  I am think I am going to try to throw for the job.  I bet I can learn in 1 month more about running an efficient and humane shelter that all of these bozos could learn in a lifetime.  

But, yes, the knee is doing well.  I am basically moving around just fine with some soreness if I do too much.  I think my knee already feels better than it did before surgery-I am using mental persuasion on myself.  I know the truth on if surgery helped or not will not be realized till a couple of months from now when I try to run.  :)  

But, I was told they extracted a cyst of 10 cm out of my knee/hamstrings.  Since I am a dumb American, I measured 10 cm today just to see what 10cm actually looks like.  I feel so much better knowing I don't have a cell phone in my knee anymore.  

Wait!  Addendum!  I have correctly identified the Nuun tablet holder as being the culprit.  Exactly 10 cm.  2-3 cm width.  Hmmmmm.....maybe that was bothering me a spot.  

Cayenne is back in her flower.

Tonight Dave and I drove home from the vet's office with our two dogs in the backseat. We were musing over the fact that we had just spent a quarter of our paycheck on Cayenne's elective foot surgery. Foot surgery that I chose for her to have to hopefully alleviate pain, which has ended up in an amputation and possible loss of function- and more pain than any dog should feel. Do I feel like a bad mom? You bet. Does it hurt to lose money when we are trying to claw our way out of debt Dave Ramsey style? Of course. And mostly, I am worried sick about my dog.

As we drove through a Memphis ghetto, Dave and I chewed on some of the decisions we have made or contemplated through the day we spent together: Cayenne's foot, moving to New Orleans, remodeling the nasty kitchen, purchasing a used car to replace our dying car, my surgery, paying back student loans, etc...

Dave gently said that life is full of tough decisions, and we sat quietly in the car, reflecting our day. Every day we will face challenges and tough decisions- it doesn't get any easier, and we don't even have kids yet.

It was such a beautiful moment for me, though, as we concluded that life is about the way you handle the tough times and make the tough decisions. I couldn't have been happier riding in the car with my husband and two loving dogs- my family.

Look at this picture? I love this picture. I have a happy family and a great life. This picture of my two dogs gives me warm fuzzies.

Picture of the posterior incision-

Day 5-The knee is doing well. I am recovering nicely and staying off of it. No rush here to get moving, and that is the beauty of being injured so long. My patience is getting stronger and I am willing to rest more and heal more to reap long term benefits. I will be excited to share good news as I start to do a little more rehab and strengthen the leg again.

Day 3...

Day 3-
Things are going okay. I definitely have ups and downs all day long, and I am sure it is mostly the result of medication and sitting on my bum. Most of the time I feel positive and I can't wait to start rehabbing my knee. There are moments, though, where I feel afraid that my rehab won't be good enough or that I won't return to running or triathlon. I just have to push those fears aside and continue to give myself a lot of positive talk.

This is my daily view! The dogs have been great company :)

I am a little surprised at how needy I have been post surgery. Since Dave has been working full time every day, I have really felt lonely. By about 1:00pm yesterday, I was in full tears as I could not fix myself lunch and had no one around to help. Dave called with his normal cheery self and I had to explain to him through tears that I need him to check on me more often. Lucky for me, Kathy walked through the door right then with pumpkin pie- followed by Bekah, Laura, Latte, and cheesecake an hour or so later. I also started getting some phone calls and text messages which really cheered me up. Thank you!

I think Bekah understands how much I have really needed help and company because she came back to visit me last night in full Halloween gear. Her husband, Jon, is Brett Michaels, and she is his Rock of Love.


And just as I am writing this Bekah has walked through my door! Thank goodness!!!!!!!! Seriously, she just walked in- and look what she brought over!
Which thing does not belong in this picture?

Home and Recovering :)

Damie and Cayenne- done with surgeries and on to snuggling and recovery!

Cayenne and I are going to be snuggling, recovery buddies this weekend. This past Wednesday, she had surgery on her back foot and had part of one toe removed. When we found her, almost exactly one year ago, she had trauma to one foot and limped quite a bit. The nail in one toe never grew back correctly from the damage and some weird, corny thing come back in the nail's place and started growing through the pad on her toe. Ouch! So we have been calling her our 3-legged devil for the past year! :) We thought the foot might heal on it's own with time or the pain would reside, but day after day we watched her limp in pain. We finally decided to get that part of her toe removed and help her gain some functional mobility (I write TOO many PT evals).

Anyhoo- Cayenne is doing great and snuggling with me and Roo right now. :)



The funny thing is, I planned Cayenne's surgery around mine, because I figured we could take care of each other :) I am home now with an arsenal of movies, the laptop, and The Historian as my book for the weekend. I am not going to lie, I was a little scared going in to surgery. I didn't make some of the surgery decisions until the minute before they wheeled me into the room, but I just prayed to God to give me the correct answer.

I was supposed to call the doctor tonight and talk to him about what he saw and what procedures he did to my knee. I was so nauseous for the first few hours, though, that I wasn't in any frame of mind to talk- so I will call tomorrow and get the low-down. The hard part post surgery has really been the throwing up, but now that I am over that I feel fine. Of course the knee hurts, but the pain meds are doing their job. :)

Cayenne, Roo, and I are going to live on the pull-out couch for the weekend and do all of the fine couch potato stuff possible! Happy weekend to everyone- and with my newly acquired free time I will do some catching up on my blog reading too!

Stages Of Grief?

I flipped through my Triathlon Life magazine today and looked for anything remotely interesting. Maggi Finley's name was in there with her nice Nationals performance, so that was fun. Otherwise I find the magazine a little boring. I did come across an article about the stages of grief during an injury and I decided to get in tune with my inner Kubler-Ross and anazlyze myself.

1. Denial- nope. Don't remember being in denial. I remember feeling really injured. Oh wait, I did try to race at the end of May. Maybe I was in denial about how serious it was really turning out to be. Maybe I was in denial about how long it would take me to recover from my injury. I remember swimming 20,000 yards one week to stay in shape so I could jump right back into racing. You won't catch me swimming that much now! I know better!

2. Anger- All of those dern treadmill tempo runs at 5am (twice as bad) down the tube. Oh, and those killer Peddler rides that forced me to learn to hurt? All for naught. I guess I was a little mad to work so hard on my fitness and never get a chance to use it.

3. Bargaining- I know I for sure did this one. "I will just do a little sprint, and I promise to walk if it hurts." That was my favorite bargaining tool.

4. Depression- oh, that must be referring to the two months I just stopped doing everything besides eating cheesecake. I stopped going to swim class, stopped going to yoga, and just stopped caring. I mean, really, what is the point in trying to stay in shape when you are clearly so out of shape?

5. Acceptance- finally, I have made it to the last stage and I am moving on.

I knew that degree in psychology would come in handy some day! Har har har- seriously, I am really happy to be moving forward with this. Plus, I get to miss two days of work, so that is more of a thrill than anything else. Whatever happened to fall break?

Scheduled!

The long awaited surgery has been scheduled.  This Friday we will fix everything.  

Just kidding-  but if only that were true.  What do you mean you can't make my knees feel like they did when I was 16?  Oh, maybe not 16, I was sitting on the bench with a torn MCL.  How about a 10 year-old's knees?  Yes, I have been dealing with right knee injuries for a longgggg time.  My dad made me feel a lot better about my decision to have surgery when he reminded me of all of the injuries I have had to the right knee since high school.   

This Friday we will attempt to take care of a few small things.  I am actually going to have two small surgeries.  (Dave calls them procedures and didn't even bother taking off of work, but I think anytime they put you to sleep and make you sign a waiver saying you could die, that counts as surgery.  Okay, so maybe I am milking it a bit, but I would like to babied a little :)  

If you want to know-First we are going to do a posterior incision in the back of the knee joint/hamstrings in order to get the cyst.  It is embedded in my hamstrings somewhat and we can't get it through a scope.  Then we are going to do a scope and look for meniscus damage as we are pretty sure there is a medial tear somewhere- and fix it.  We area also going to remove some bone spurs that are pretty significant and hitting the femur.  

The only other possibility is a limited lateral release.  The doc says yes, and I say I don't know.  So, we will decide on Friday- although I am still leaning towards no.  There would have to be something really, really convincing to make me change my mind.

We aren't touching the femur.  I know, I know- the biggest elephant in the room and I am just ignoring it for now.  No need to go crazy on my knee, you know?  The doc made some suggestions, but none sound good to me so I can be patient and wait for the right thing.  

So, that is that!  I have actually felt a lot of relief with the decision.  I don't know what the outcome will be, but it feels good to move forward.  

In all honesty, Dave feels really bad now because we found out someone has to be with me through the entire surgery, and he can't be there.  (Don't worry, papa is a worthy replacement).  And then, Dave found out he has to work the entire weekend and can't baby me at all!  So, if you are in the mood to coddle a pitiful 31-year-old, please feel free to stop by over the weekend and don't forget the cheesecake.  

When Dave Is Not Home...

Shhhh!!!!  Don't tell.  

I cook.  (sometimes)  I NEVER let him know that I can cook even a smidge.  But, since he is not here to cook me MY dinner, I guess I will just have to fend for myself.  Scallops and asparagus- yum yum! 

(disclaimer to gourmet chefs- don't judge.  It is a BIG deal for me to cook anything that doesn't require a microwave or come in a package!)

Then I give the dogs toys that Dave will never give them because they are too messy.  I let them tear the toys up and I don't clean it up for hours.  We walk around the house singing- "if you don't want to party then you should go homeeee..."  and "Roonylicious".    

And then we start to get a little bored with ourselves...  We play on the computer, read up on Kickette (of course) and wait for Dave to get home.  

Snuggies

For your enjoyment, a picture of me making a fool out of myself.  That is me in the blue dress-groping my sister's husband of 10 whole minutes.  

There is simply no point to this post than to say I LOVE MY FRIENDS.  Joy and Laura left me recently to go to Hawaii.  I missed them tremendously, but now they are back so I can stalk them by calling 5 times within a 3 minute period...wondering- why haven't they called me back- I NEED YOU? They are my comfort blankies- my snuggies.  That is my new term for good friends- snuggies.  I will title this post snuggies.  I cried 3 x tonight- all for random reasons including the realization that Rooney will not be with me for my whole life (what a sucky realization) and some other randomness that just makes up my life.   My snuggies were there for me in all of my craziness tonight- thank you Joy and La! 

A day in the life-

1.  I show up to master's swim and am forced to do butterfly in front of high school swimmers and an Olympian from the past Olympics.  Thanks for that one.  Embarrassed yet?

2.  Speak your mind at work only to have crazy, intimidated females lash out at you and kiss up to the boss even though they 100% agree with what you have just said but will never have the balls to say what they mean.  (using honey, not vinegar- as I have been to do in the south- ughhhh!!!!!)

3.  Plan on riding trainer only to have father come over and invite to dinner for wine, fish, and chips.  Burn calories or consume calories?  How can you turn down your dad?

4.  Cry three times in one day- and feel completely better.  Wonder if you are pregnant, then figure out it is PMS.  Drink 2 glasses of wine and call it a night.  

I think I need a girl's night out. Any takers? We could all wear snuggies???

Review, Results, Renew

Do we look tired? Hee hee!

The current state of affairs-

In review, I have a big lesion on my lateral femoral condyle. It occurred in 2005, and I have clawed my way back to fitness, health, and fun athletics after being told I would only be able to work out a couple of days a week for health. It was not a running injury- at the time, I was a soccer player! Running more than 4 miles was a BIG day for me. I didn't even race in 5ks! I am lucky to have since done a dozen half marathons, 4 marathons, 2 half IMs, and 1 Ironman.

And then there was that race in March- the immediate pain- the inability to walk. I knew something was very wrong. I had many people tell me I just needed to take time off from running- that is was patella femoral pain. I knew better. My miles were so low- I had been so healthy. I knew it was my femur, and sho 'nuff...

This past Wednesday I finally had the consultation about my knee with two different doctors that are working together with me. (I have seen 4 in the past half year). We were hopeful that at best, I could have some tissue release on the lateral side to alleviate any extra stress on the femur. At worst, there is an experimental surgical procedure for a new type of cartilage implantation- and the doctor was excited that I may be a candidate.

Unfortunately, I am a candidate for nothing. The bone/cartilage doctor said this is the end of the line- surgical procedures will fail because my bone is too damaged. He cannot microfracture, cartilage implant, drill, replace, etc... And since this is not a patella tracking issue, a tissue release will not fix the problem. I got the same sad line handed to me in 2009 that I had in 2005- I will not be a runner/soccer player again. The doctor sounded so sad- sad for me. He said he has never seen a knee on a 31-year-old look like mine. The cartilage damage is astounding.

The other doctor had a more hopeful prognosis- given that he is a cyclist and knows how important sports are to me. He thinks we should scope the knee regardless and remove any damage and osteophytes that may be contributors to pain that we can safely touch, drain the 10cm cyst in my knee, and check for any meniscus damage we can't find on the MRI. After 7 months of rest, failed healing attemps that included PT, crazy hot yoga, too many walks, and too many cheesecake sessions- I understand that rest is not the solution anymore. Rest will not heal my bone- it will not heal. We have to approach this differently. I may have some big changes to make in my future with training and racing, but I am not giving up. I am "only" 31 years old, and like the doc said..."if it were my knee..."

I feel more positive now than I did 4 months ago. I am still not running, but I did get clearance to ride my bike. I am going to make some surgery decisions so I can start the healing process. I will have to change my tune towards running in the future, but I think I can work through that and still enjoy the sport. And, I am going to get back into a coaching relationship- I thought this whole time I did not need a coach because I can't do anything while I am injured. Now I realize the opposite. I need a coach to help me move forward with this injury. The cheesecake sure ain't helping. Don't believe me about the cheesecake? If you look up at the pic above, you will see my plate on the table- the remnants of cheesecake. Yes indeed.

Although I am not running now, I did get cleared to ride my bike. I also just got a hand-me-down mtn. bike from a friend and will be going on my first mtn. bike ride today. Dave does not think I should go alone and thinks me and a mtn. bike are a bad combination. Since he is at work, I am sneaking off....

Happy/Mad

Happy :)

My little sister Rebekah got married this weekend to a great guy Jon.  Our family flew out to Vegas and partied with Elvis in celebration of the big event.  

Bekah and Jon making sure their music is in order for the ceremony.  

Damie and Bekah- PRUNE.  I think I am getting the hang of it...just a little more practice....

Damie and Dave at the cermony.  

Mad:(

I am angry- no ANGRY- about my knee. I can't get doctors to call me back- I can't get a straight answer. 

It is crazy because I keep trying to write this post, and all of this angry stuff just keeps coming out and I can't even get it straight.  

I just wrote a huge paragraph- and rewrote it- and rewrote it.  Just forget it.  What I really need is for some good prayers that this is figured out.  This is very important to me and I have worked really hard to heal this knee.  I need less criticism from people that don't even know what is going on with my knee (okay, it is really just one person that is upsetting me) and more positive energy from friends (that would be all of you guys).  

xxxxoooo happy week to all.  

Congratulations to my friends in Kona.  

  

A Typical Random Post

This weekend is my sis's wedding in Vegas.  Of course I will post some pics for all to see! :)  

Knee news- well, there is the S word hanging in the air.  The doc was supposed to call me back today, and since he will be out of town till next week, I am guessing that won't happen.  At this point, we know that the bone and cartilage are damaged beyond typical repair.  I am not a candidate for microfracture since the lesion is too big.  So, really no news until we talk more.  If there is one iota of a chance that there is a holistic solution, I will take it.  

Anytime I hear Canned Heat I think of Center Stage- NOT Napoleon Dynamite.  

Work is good- and tough.  I am happy to have a job and remind myself every day to not take it for granted.  There are times I wish my boss would show me some more appreciation and come to work in a good mood instead of unleashing negative energy on her employees, but I am trying to keep my focus on my development- not the surroundings out of my control.  I am also working to always raise the bar on my empathy, tolerance, and patience.  

I asked my sister to do my eyebrows (they look like caterpillars- so bad!).  She does not have time, so I guess I will have bad eyebrows for the wedding. 

My house is a wreck.  One day I may have a house that is presentable when guests stop by.  I bet if we had a bloggers' dirty house contest I would win.  I now know why my house is horrible- I stayed up to clean and I am writing on my blog.  It seems I always find something else to do.  

I love that my dogs know when it is bedtime.  They are asleep right now- yup- by 9:00 it is night-night time.  They are probably wondering why I am still up.  (they know me too well and know I never planned to clean)

Okay- time for bed.  I am have 3 books waiting for me:  Riding the Bus With My Sister (last month's book club book I never finished), The Help (next month's bookclub book that I am determined to read before the actual bookclub meeting), and Running To the Top by Lydiard (that I purchased before the good Chuckie V post- although I was pleased with myself to find that I had a good handful of his recommended books already dog-eared from many good reads).  

I am not sure why I am reading running books when I can't run.  The power of positive thinking, I guess.  

Love It

Here are some funny pics a friend just sent me from back in the day in my New Orleans soccer life.  (seems like decades ago....)
Check out my long hair!  And my oversized soccer jersey (weird, but I don't even remember that jersey.  I am losing more memory every day)!  I think we were at Cooter Browns watching a soccer game on TV.  

And Dave...how young!  Too cute!

Anyhoo- heading to the doc again tomorrow to make some decisions regarding surgery.  I am a happy and nervous, if there can be such a combination.  Will post more when it gets figured out.  

Bachelorette Night!

Grandma Damie got out of the house and actually attended a party last night!  Whoo Hoo! Good thing, because I was the hostess of the party- and that meant I had to stay out late- no yawning and no looking at the clock.  This is very hard for me and my early bedtime ways.  But, I only have one sister so I knew I had to put the party dress on and go have some fun!

Me, Bachelorette Rebekah (aka Sugar Free Candy Love) and Michelle on our way to the Molly Fontaine Lounge for martinis and fun.  

Yes, I made Rebekah wear the condom veil and drink out of penis straws.  I think I kept it tastefully tacky, if I may say so myself.  

I love this picture of my mom, Rebekah, and family friend Jean- caught in a good time moment.

How many martinis have we had?  I am guessing more than a few since I have a tattoo on my boob and Bekah's looking like she is having quite a bit of fun.  

Thank gosh the stripper showed up.  Clark came at a good price...  :)

And, there is no party like a party with my two awesome girls, Laura and Joy.