First "race" of 2018. Racing my way into shape, I am. And it is hard, and it sucks, and I am slow. It is kind of fun, mostly because I like to run no matter what. I realized recently that age 39 put me at 25 years of formal running as I started running track in high school at age 14. Wow. It has been a good 25 years.
But I feel super betrayed by my body, still. I set another personal worst for the 9k race. Well, maybe not a PW as I ran a 5 miler pretty darn slow 6 weeks after I had Isla. But, if we exclude 5 months post partum, every race in the past 2 years has been a PW and the trend continues. But this is not a post to continue my complaints about my lists of PWs handed to me from 2017 on. This is my post to say I expect them to be there as I race through the year. My process will clearly take me through many slow miles.
At the race, my pacing is excellent as always. I can't remember my exact splits and don't feel like looking them up, but it was something like 8:30, 8:15, 8:10, 8:05, 7:55, 7:45. Or something close to that. Can't remember exact average pace but maybe close to 8:07? So, my 9k pace is my old marathon pace or Sunday long run while talking with friends pace. Oh my gerd. But, I am racing correctly for my fitness level. My body just really won't go faster. And fortunately I just have a good feel for what my body can do and I do it and that is that. So, I settle into my run and know it is where it is going to be regardless of what numbers I want to see on the clock. I don't fret, I just try to sustain.
So, I am going into these races knowing I will set PWs and I will be slow and feel very unathletic. Since this is the case, I have a bunch of process goals for the races. 1. All through the race I remind myself these miles are making me fitter. 2. I work on my form, which has really deteriorated over the past 2 years. I focus on my arms, shoulders, hands, turnover, push off, running tall (I swear I have started to shrink and become sway back), etc. 3. I work on even and/or negative split pacing and the feel of the pacing. 4. I try to continue to cultivate my love for running....feeling the positive vibes of a good run on an early morning, meeting new people, saying kind words to others on the course, etc. Honestly, it is easier to love running when running is easier. And when it is not easy I have absorb positive from every external source from the beautiful morning, to the historical site I run through, to the other humans on the course with me. 5. Oh, and I work on cutting the tangents. I always work on this.
40 is just 2 months away. Between now and then, and for the rest of my 40th year, I am going to race my way back into shape. I am just not quite ready to give up on all of this just yet, and in the meantime I will keep trying to post every race to see if 2018 will bring about some needed progress. Next race should be a 5k in a couple of weeks. My original goal was to get under 8 min per mile, but my mileage has been super low (15-20 miles low) , so I may not see linear progress from race to race. Totally fine with that. just so long as at some point, not light years away, I start to get faster.
#hopeful
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