Are We There Yet?

I am in total lazy mode. I am still doing the workouts, but instead of popping up with the sunrise, I am now in the complete habit of relying on Dave and Rooney to get me up in the morning. Apparently last week was not a one-time deal. I am blaming it on not having any coffee in 3 weeks. There is no wonderful pot of coffee waiting for me in the morning...enticing me to get up and swim/bike/run.

At this point I am spending most of my time stressing about packing for the trip...especially my bike. I have already freaked out a million times in my own head about my bike not arriving, being broken, etc. I am trying to minimize the last minute worry and have everything complete and ready, but I keep running into bumps in the road. For example, I only have one water bottle holder. Wales only has water on the bike course every 23 or so miles. I need another way to carry a second bottle. I haven't figured this out. Tick tock, tick tock.

In the meantime, let me direct you to two good posts to read.

Hillary's post on her IMKY race. I love this post. Hillary is obviously a very accomplished pro athlete with an Ironman win to her name. She still has to work hard, though, and running up to her expectations does not just fall into her lap. What is even more amazing is how hard she still works at swimming- the amount of time and yardage she puts into her training, even though she is already one of the best. Reading how hard some pros work, like Hillary, is inspiring- much more than the athlete that just seems to always be fast because they just are.

Which leads into this post on Endurance Corner. I was literally just saying the same thing to Alyson this weekend...triathletes that step on the scene and are quickly National class are OUTLIERS! Same as the triathletes you know that eat cake all day long, claim to train 1/4 of the time of everyone else, and seem to have no intensity or competitive drive- yet win races and place nationally. Either they are LYING about how much effort they put into triathlon (and yes, some people do this...why, I don't know) or they are OUTLIERS. The majority of us age groupers have to work very hard to improve just little bits at a time. Don't give up, and don't get discouraged when you read blogs about people that are just super-duper fast, qualified for Hawaii on their first try, and ran a 40 minute 10k the first time they ever put on running shoes. I know several people like this! Many of them have worked hard for years, and you just never saw it. Some are just gifted and the results come quicker or easier. Most everyone else works really hard for years and might not see fast results. Hang in there- don't compare- keep moving forward.

As for me, I am just ready for next Sunday to get here!!!! Hurry hurry!!!!

Circle

When I was a kid, one of my favorite movies was Beastmaster. (still a favorite, actually). Of course I loved that Dar could talk to animals. I always thought I could too. But my favorite quote from the movie is, "Life is a circle. We'll meet again."

I believe in kindness to all creatures. I believe in karma. I believe that every time I extend a helping hand to an animal in need, it will come back to me sometime in this life. I believe making a difference to one small animal is important.

More recently, I started to believe that if I choose to not be part of the solution, then I am actually part of the problem. I got tired of hearing "you can't save them all" from people that won't even try to save one. I got tired of hearing "not my problem" when people saw abandoned and abused animals on the side of the road.

No, I can't save them all. Shoot, I can't even find Shelby Angel a home and it haunts me every single day. Every day. Not a day goes by that I don't think about it. But yes, I can make a difference. I would rather fail trying than to never try at all for something in which I claim to believe.

Below is the best part of my entire week. Hands down. This is what life is all about. This is why I spend most of my Friday nights dog-walking and volunteering.

Maybe 6-8 weeks ago or so, I stopped my car on the way home from work when I saw two white, pit puppies crossing a really busy and dangerous road. I got out of my car and thought that maybe I could try to help them. Of course, I was not in a good part of town, but when are you ever in Memphis?

As I got close to the puppies, they looked to be about 4 months old and were completely emaciated. One had wire wrapped around its neck. Wire. I wanted to throw up. They were trying to eat out of trash bags on the side of the road. When I approached the dogs, they started to cry- a horrible, abused cry. I will never forget that cry. It was the cry of an animal that has been hurt by a human and fears for its life. I hope you never hear it. They ran off and I could not catch them.

I went to my car and got some dog food. (I now always keep an extra supply because I am always encountering starving strays). I tracked the dogs into someone's yard- completely trespassing and probably a prime target to get shot. I could not lure the dogs close to me, and I ended up scaring them so much they ran back into traffic. I gave up because I knew I would not be able to catch them, and I left them food and prayers.

As is typical of me, I got in the car and called Dave and just cried and cried. Dave worries that I risk too much to save animals, but I don't even think twice about it. Sometimes it is just the right thing to do. The call is very clear to me when I get it. Dave listened and comforted. For the past months, I have looked for those dogs on that road. Of course, I never saw them again, but they have been on my mind ever since. Daily.
Until tonight. I was dog-walking at the Humane Society when John, an kennel worker, was walking "Wilbur," a new puppy. He immediately caught my eye, and I made the comment about how he looked so much like a dog that I tried to rescue on Tchulahoma road. Well, guess where Wilbur and his sister were rescue recently? Tchulahoma road in an abuse case. Out of the thousands and thousands of animals I see- and that are abused here in this city- of all the places he could have gone...the dog I had prayed for so many days was right in front of me.

I rushed to go outside and meet Wilbur, a dog that has been on my mind for 2 months. He came running up to me with his tail wagging and immediately snuggled with me and would not leave my side. We just sat there snuggling and hugging and loving.

John could not believe his eyes- he said Wilbur has been so scared of everyone and has not let anyone pet him or make contact with him. There was this huge, instant connection and Wilbur would not leave my side. It was so amazing, and John just kept saying over and over how unbelievable it was. Did Wilbur remember me? Did he remember my smell from the food? Could he just tell that I was a person that really loved him deep down? I had to walk in with him because he got so upset when he was separated from me.

His sister is at the Human Society too, but she is not doing well and is needing treatment. Hopefully I will get to see her soon. I feel like God answered my prayers. He really listened and knew how much my heart hurt. To see these dogs safe- I can't tell you what this means to me. This might be the best day of my whole year.

Life is a circle. Kindness to animals does matter.

And, for those of you who think you might want a dog one day- hands down, this is going to be a great dog. Oh man. What a sweetheart. I am beyond partial to pits, of course, but this dog is just the most gentle, submissive lover ever. Nothing is better than a rescue dog that knows love. You will never find a more faithful and loving companion. Check him out- and his sister too when she heals at the Memphis Humane Society. I am so in love I am going to have to make some extra trips this week to see him.

Still Going

Dave got a good one in this morning. I didn't jump up with the alarm and just kind of rolled over and told him not to worry about it. He said something to the effect of "oh, that's right. I guess this is the end of training."

Ahhh! No it is not! I had a tempo run this morning before work. With that nice little zinger I jumped out of bed and hit the road. Touche, Dave.

But maybe I am relaxing just slightly. Caroline decided we needed to get together and do something that was non-training related. On a weekday night. And I said yes.

I have blogged and bragged about Caroline in previous posts. She is such an amazing athlete and definitely one of the fastest runners in the city. She makes an amazing training partner (I don't have as much to give back. I just show up and watch her and Rachel run off in the distance). More importantly, she is just a beautiful person, good friend, and amazing life force.

I consider last night part of ironman training because it was "mental training." We talked about my idea for a successful ironman, positive things from the year as a whole, and how to block out the "town criers." I left dinner feeling so happy I was almost giddy. (or was that the margarita?) Seriously, I was smiling ear to ear after such a lovely time with another athlete that just gets it. If you don't have a friend like Caroline, I suggest you get one immediately. They are imperative to helping you feel great, staying focused, and remaining positive. Happy training!

Couch Night

I am at home being very non-triathlety tonight. I am on the couch, watching....TV!

(does anyone else ever think of Billy Madison when they hear the word couch? C-O-R- are you going to the mall today?)

It is hard for me to believe that people do this every night (ahem, my husband). Just sitting here is hard. I feel like I should be doing a million other things.

The dogs have told me otherwise. They have cornered me on the couch and sandwiched me.

So I have obliged.

I watched an old Sex In The City episode- the one where Samantha throws an I'm not having a baby shower. Crack me up. I love that show.

By the way, my Sex In The City character, according to the online quiz, is part Carrie and part Charlotte. Charlotte? I didn't see that one coming.

I will end this post by embarrassingly admitting that I just actually laughed, more than once, at Keeping Up With The Kardashians. How can you not laugh at Kris and Bruce? They make the show.

Okay, this is why I don't watch TV. My channel selection resembles my reading genre selection. Trash.

Off to bed! :)

Starting To Wrap It Up

3 weeks to go.

I just finished a very hard week. I think. Hard is so relative these days. I just do the work and don't really think about it. It is sometimes only after the week has ended that I look back and think...I did what??? If anything is an indicator, though, it would be my waking up at 12:30am last night, starving and eating a bowl of cereal before climbing back in bed with ritz crackers in hand.

Huge milestone- on top of a big cycling week including a 70something miler on Wed and a 100miler yesterday, I still managed a running week of 54 miles.

My longest run week ever. Ever.

No abnormal pain.

Which goes to show what a jerk I was all of those years trying to train through injuries. I have been training through injuries since I was 15 years old and tore my MCL for the first time. I wish I knew then what I know now. If any of this resonates with you, then stop what you are doing. It is not working. Rethink the plan and find something that works. Stop doing the same thing.

Yesterday I thought about what is different for me this summer. Why has my training seemed to be more successful? Having less pain is an obvious answer, but what else is different? Here are just a few things out of many that I have changed.

1. My focus has increased. It is hard to quantify this for you.

2. I have made it a habit to get up early. Every single day including weekends. Most of us have to contend with some overwhelming heat this summer. It takes a lot of work to find ways to be successful in the heat. In 2008, I would start my long runs at 9am, and wondered why I ran so poorly. Now I am up at dark. While I can't ultimately control the weather, I can give myself a better chance of success by starting without the sun. (and it goes without mentioning I have to go to work. Better to just git-r-done.)

3. I do what it takes. Coolers full of water, ice, and towels on my running routes. Boxes full of gels. I now practice like I race. If you saw me run my brick yesterday, you would have seen me dumping water on my head every 5 minutes and putting ice down my top at every pit stop. I never did this in the years before. I just didn't put in the effort to make my workouts as successful as possible.

I have thought of many, many more things I am doing differently, but this post is getting long so I might have to save it for another day.

To end my ramblings, I did make it a priority to go to church today. This was not only for myself, but for my husband who probably would like to live a normal life from time to time. As I prayed to be a better wife and person, I was reminded, again, that triathlon is just not that important. Period. Sport is great and I want to be the very best that I can be in my chosen lifestyle. But, sport comes and goes as do our abilities. Training and racing has been wonderful, and I hope to continue for a long time. I do try to keep it in perspective, though, and I am thankful for my family, friends, job, and overall great life. I am enjoying the process and journey towards this ironman, but never forgetting that the greatest treasures in my life are the people whom I love.

It Takes A Village

It takes a village to raise an ironman triathlete. Or, it takes a village to raise the local idiot ironman triathlete...ahem...me. In the past few weeks, I have had more teammates and friends come to my rescue or save me from my own destruction.

• Stuck in the middle of a storm? (It said 30% chance at 9am....not my fault). I didn't even have to ask my husband to come pick me up. He actually got in the car and came looking for me.
  

• Need a cup of coffee while you are soaked to the bone and fearing for your life on flooded streets in the middle of a storm? Just go to Alisha and Brandon's house and disrupt them on their way to work. Nothing like a teammate showing up unannounced for a pit stop :)

• Left your pump and lights in the trunk of your car...which was left at the shop? Just call Curt Arthur late at night and then show up at his house at 5:30am. Problem solved.
  

• Killed your ipod because you run too much and it is too humid? Just complain about how broke you are at Bookclub and tell everyone about your Ipod woes, and Heather Cooley will give you one of her ipods.

• Killed your Garmin as well and you are too mad to pay the $$$ to send it in when it shouldn't break in the first place? Who needs HR data, right? After all...it is the only thing you use! Aghhh!!!! Gina will come rescue your thrifty butt and just let you borrow hers.

• Don't know how you are going to hydrate during your 3 hour run? Alyson will provide a cooler full of ice and water and have it waiting for you on the route.
  

• Accidentally end your 3 hour run about 7 miles from your house? Hey! Private taxi! Just call Alyson again and tell you her are stranded- your chariot will be there shortly!

• No glue on your race wheels? Tom has an extra set for you. While he is at it, he has a rear water bottle cage for you as well.
  

• Need some calories but still can't eat solid foods? Jeff and Wendy will buy you a little frozen treat at the end of a race as if you were their own child.
  

• Nothing to wear for your ironman? Joy will send you her new, expensive wetsuit and a tri suit. No problem!

• Mid ride and out of calories? Just raid Lesley Brainard's pantry. Powerbar, Coke, 2 bottles of Gatorade, ice and water...anything to get you back on the road!
  

Thank you so much to all of my friends that help me make it happen. I am sure I am leaving some good folks out. Within the past few weeks I have had so many things break or die...as well as a few poor planning moments of my own to add to the fun. Triathlon is such a great sport- and I love my team and our little village. Thanks for taking care of me!

The Next Day

There might not be anyone that knows me better as an athlete than Dave, and there is a lot of humor to be found in that understanding.

I woke up this morning feeling, as expected, weak and still a little sick.

Damie: "I think I made a mistake. I shouldn't have raced yesterday."

Dave: "No, you shouldn't have. But you were always going to."

Damie: "Why didn't you stop me?"

Dave: laughs

I started to think about how Dave calls me an addict. He thinks that triathlon is really an addiction that is shelved under the title of "sport." He thinks we treat the sport much like alcoholics or drug users and trash our bodies in the process. So I asked him, "When I raced yesterday, is that because I am an addict?"

He said, "No, it is because you are a competitor."

Happy Sunday!

On that note, I guess I will attempt to go running after all.

Keep On Moving On!!!

Getting a virus (?) or food poisoning (?) was so ill-timed because I had already signed up for a race this weekend, and I just did not want to miss out on another race. My nurse friend said no, Dave said whatever is good for your ironman, and Tim pretty much lets me make my own decisions because I think he has good trust in me that I can self-regulate.

I have not been sick one single time during ironman training, and I did not have any zeros in my log since I started working with Tim until this week. My training has been great. I am fit. I feel confident and excited about Wales and most importantly I am not even remotely burned out or injured. I still love to train and race :)

My big limiter was lack of fluid and calorie intake for the past 60 hours or so. But, I managed to start downing liquids and keeping them down. I wasn't getting calories, but I was getting some hydration back. I definitely haven't been able to train the past few days. It was going to be a race morning call. I woke up this morning drenched in sweat...clothes soaked...bed soaked... and I didn't know if the fever had broken or if I was still battling. But, 4am- I am up, I am racing.

I mean, Tom had pimped my bike out with a disc! I couldn't pass up the opportunity to ride my first disc. :) The disc did not get put to good use today, but maybe next time I will be disc-worthy :)

It was just a sprint, and I had several things I wanted to work on today. Plus, I wanted to just enjoy a short race! I needed a little break from the normal 90 to 100 mile bike ride! Sprints are just plain fun, and I needed one last little dose before I get laser focused on Wales. I was pretty sure I would be okay, but I reserved the right to bail if it meant protecting my last few weeks of training. Dizziness/body shut down/dehydration/nausea= bail.

As expected, the race was very sub par for me in all events. I was # 824 out of about 850 racers in a time trial format, so I spent a lot of time fighting the crowded course. I also just spent a lot of time feeling very weak from no food intake in the past 3 days. It was a poor athletic performance, but I think racing was still a good call because I enjoyed myself and it gave me a nice, fun break from routine. My little body gave me what it could, but it stayed pretty shut down for the day.

I enjoyed so much seeing some old friends at the race and found a lot of positives in the day. I don't feel like I did any damage to my body. I am weak from lack of eating, but no worse from the race.
The only negative from a day like today comes from EGO. I believe their are two kinds of athletes: one kind of athlete has many reasons to race and always try her best. The other kind of athlete races purely for ego, and misses a lot of good opportunities to become better along the way. I still struggle with ego at times, and I don't like to post results that are not a reflection of my fitness, but I want to be the first kind of athlete, so I am going to keep walking the walk.

I just ate a bowl of chicken noodle soup, and things are looking up. Tomorrow is a long run day. I have instructions to go easy and just do as much as I can since I will probably still be recovering and may still feel icky. I am looking forward to getting healthy, firing on all cylinders, and really bringing everything together these next few weeks. I gotta keep on moving on!!!!

PS: A Big, Huge, Effing congratulations to Tim Waggoner and Forrest Owens- nice sub 9 gold and silver buckle at Leadville 100. You guys are so awesome. And just in...Shayne Smith- 11:40 for silver buckle and Chad Terry with a finish just over 12 hours. Congrats on huge accomplishments.

This would be a great day to write a well thought out post. I have some topics and time, but I just don't have the energy. At some point last night, my body turned on me and I spent the rest of the night and the morning crying on the bathroom floor (which has a lot of dog hair on it, by the way. I never noticed. Totally gross when your face is on it).

Vomiting out of both ends, I must have flushed the toilet 50 times...and the shower has been rendered unusable for a few days. I needed multiple places for projection. It lasted almost 8 hours.

I have not thrown up in 6 years? I have not been sick in so long, and I have forgotten how horrible it is for your body to be truly sick.

I first blamed it on the food at Book Club. And, since I didn't actually read the book, wouldn't it be fitting that I got food poisoning? However, every single other person from Book Club feels just dandy.

And since I still feel 100% horrible 20 hours later...looks like I have a a circulating virus bug on my hands. The sweet life of a pediatric physical therapist.

Here's to hoping for enough fluid/calorie intake coupled with a total body rejuvenation to get me to the starting line of my race on Saturday. I was (or am?) looking forward to using a borrowed disc for the first time ever.

Weekly Bone

After my last post, I realized I am going to have to take tighter control in the next 5 weeks of my days. Like the 4 hours of sleep last night....not going to cut it. I have been unnecessarily grumpy with extraneous things like the weather (totally out of my control) most likely because I am not balanced (somewhat in my control :) Just 5 weeks away (Julia). I can do it!

I love it when life throws me a bone, though. Today I begrudgingly woke up at 4am to join an unfamiliar group of guys for a long ride. I hemmed and hawed about doing this ride. As usual, I worried that the ride would be too hard for me, and I would compromise my long ride by going out too fast in order to keep up. And, as usual again, I worry too much. The ride was great- the guys were great- my riding was great.

I followed it up with a 60 minute brick run. Some more good stuff. My legs feel completely awesome and my knees are as normal as they are going to get. All of my hard work is paying off. I don't get a bone every day, but when it comes my way, I recognize it and feel thankful. As ironman training starts to wrap up, I can say that I have done the work. I am finding ways to get it done.

Highlight of the week: learning hands on how to change my tubular tires. I now feel so smart. And did you guys know I was racing on a front tubular 404 all season long that had NO GLUE? The bike shop has wondered how I have not met my death this year.

+ and -

I figured I would start the post off with a positive. ( + )
Yesterday I had a nice round of 5 x 1 mile at approx half marathon pace. I have not been on a track since January or early February, so I was not truly looking forward to the oval. It was not a hard workout, but sometimes I get a little dread when facing the track and the clock, even at easier paces. However, a nice surprise awaited me as I ran about 20 seconds per mile faster than anticipated at what felt like a very easy effort. Mile repeats at ANY pace never feel easy to me. I could hardly believe it. Somewhere in the middle of the workout, I realized that having a good base is truly amazing.

And now for a negative rant ( - )

Today was the day that I finally got pissed. I have suffered through the heat and humidity of the south for months on end. I have stayed disciplined to my HR and gutted through workouts. I have swallowed my pride and let the mph go. I have increased my fluid intake beyond my own comprehension. I have stumbled out of the door at odd hours in the morning to "beat the heat."

But honestly, training in the heat does not make you stronger. You are not automatically fast in cooler weather after you have slogged out miles in the heat. I have decided I am just dumber and slower for all of this. I was so mad riding home today- seeing the mph and just dying in the extreme heat. I woke up earlier and tried so hard to make the best of the day. Now I know that I can ride a very slow pace at a low HR in dangerous heat. Yea me.

Grrrrrr!!!!!!!

It is just stupid. The heat is destroying my training. It is infiltrating all of my discipline and hard work. It is making a mockery of my determination to be fit for my ironman.

Our weather forecast today:
SEVERE
Extreme heat index. Outdoor exposure should be limited.
104F feels like 115F

So if you live somewhere and your training is getting "hot" at 80 degrees, I don't want to hear about it. And likewise I won't complain this winter at 30 degrees when you are 14 below. :)