Holding On Just A Little Longer.....

I am very good at pacing.  I can hold even splits in training and racing.  I can pretty much call my split and then do it within a very close range.  (at least I was good at all of this...hope it is still true! ;)  

I am not so good at pushing through and holding on.  When the pack runs/rides at a higher pace than I think I can hold, I drop back.  I am saving myself....from what?  I am not sure, but I think I am saving myself from a sure death.  

However, this hinders me as an athlete.  The safety of the splits I know I can hold...the familiarity of the paces I know so well...   It is good, but then there is no BREAKTHROUGH.

Since I recognize this as a weakness of mine, I now look for times when I have allowed my comfort zone to dictate my training.  On Tuesday, we were given a really tough set- well, tough for me (non-swimmer)for sure, and I think Steve would agree.  Given the fact that we have both missed a good handful of swim sessions lately, it was a little scary when the main set was 1,900 of different distances on an very challenging pace.  The only thing I could think to say was, "wow...we don't get to talk to each other today, do we?"  There was maybe 5-10 seconds of planned rest between everything...the whole time...if that.  

After the 7th whatever we were on, I heard that voice in my head.  It said, YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO HOLD THIS PACE THE WHOLE TIME.  I wasn't even half way through and I panicked.  I sat out the next 100- and the coach asked if something was wrong.  I said- no...but I can't hold that pace!  He couldn't understand why I would stop, when I had made every interval with time to spare- I hadn't even fallen behind yet!  

I got back into the mix after that- realizing my mistake and held strong the rest of the time.  Yes, I felt like throwing up the rest of the set- it was the first time I have ever been nauseous in the pool.  But, when I finished the set (and I did...I made ever interval)- I just wished I had held on a little bit longer in the early part of the swim... it was like having an asterisk by my workout since I sat out one 100.   

So, one of my overall athletic goals is to learn to push more in training- to trust the times coaches give me, even if I think they are ludicrous- and to not drop out of any set until I fall over or drown.  

I am also happy to say I have been on my trainer 2 x this week.  Monday it was miserable- I couldn't wait to get off.  Tonight I enjoyed it just a little more...it reminded me of all of the IM training on the trainer and it was a little easier to stay on.  I have really, really neglected my bikes and I am going to try to start making it up to them.