Race Tomorrow- Yippee!!!

I am actually excited to race tomorrow, and that is good news. The past few races have been a little ho hum for me, and I finally okay with that. It is all part of my process as an athlete- the good, the bad, and the ho hum. Recently it seems I have been going through the motions. I have had one or two pretty good races this year, but the rest have left me with a twinge of disappointment. Why? Because I was not happy with my effort. I have won my age group but felt unhappy with my race. On the other hand, I have been far back in the standings but felt that I had kicked ass. It is all in the effort I have given. I am not sure if others think this way or not. I could score 3 goals in a soccer game and then come home and pout. Dave would ask me why?- we won the game- I had some great goals. But, I was upset because I didn't think I was aggressive enough- or didn't dominate the midfield, etc... On the other hand, I have lost games but felt that I rocked. So, results to me are only as good as the effort it took me to obtain them. That is the way I tick.

Some of my best races have moments where I remember kicking ass- or being extremely proud of my effort.

• The time I passed a rider that I regarded as a stronger rider than myself-
• Mile 5 of 6 where a faster runner passed me, but I forced myself to hang on to her shoulder and beat her in the sprint to the line- I held on the whole time and refused to let go.
  
• The race where a very strong rider passed me early on, but at the end of my ride she was right there in my vision because I never quit chasing her-
• The race where I ended up 6th overall and I really wanted 5th. I never gave up. I passed a female in the last half mile to get that 6th place spot. If I had quit working, I would've been 7th. But, I didn't give up even though I wasn't top 5.
• The race where I knew there was some regional competition and I never felt inferior or sub par. I had completely confidence that I was up to the challenge and ready to show them what I could do.
  

I also recall specific moments where I gave up

• The time that girl passed me at mile 2 of the run. Instead of getting on her shoulder I slowed down. Wouldn't you know I let 2 girls in my age group pass me at the end of the race too. Even though I still won my age group (TT start), I was really bummed about my race effort. I should've never given up when the first girl passed.
• The recent race where I saw a girl in my age group in T2- and realized she had started way behind me in the TT start and was 3 minutes up on me. I was deflated and ran my worst triathlon 10k to date. Instead I should've gotten mad!
• Any race where I looked over at the women around and didn't feel confident that I could hold my own.
  

So here is something funny from Jen Harrison that she wrote a while back in July. Some of you may have already read it, but it cracked me up when she pointed me out.

I was talking to Damie today and I was talking to her about her Triathlon tomorrow and I told her, “get mean!!!” “get aggressive” and put on your big girl underwear! I was serious. Stop playing nice. If you wanted nice you would have taken up synchronized swimming. And, wait a second…..before you all freak out….I do not mean BE MEAN…no no no….All I mean is to get that fire burning to just lay it out on the line…get after IT.

Jen, I would never take up synchronized swimming- I know you haven't seen me swim, but there is nothing pretty about it! I don't even think I could float if you asked me to. Ha! But, tomorrow I am going to get after it. I have been training my butt off and my body is strong. I am going to race hard till the end- focus on the process. I plan on making sure I exhaust the swim- no playing in the water-no swimming like a beginner. I am going to really push it on the bike and test my legs and the additional bike miles they have on them this year. Finally, I am going to make the run hurt and NOT back off. I know the pain will come around the mile 1 marker when the race becomes an uphill trail battle for 2 miles. I will not ease up and I will not give up if I look down and see some slower mile splits. There is a good chance that everyone else is hurting too. So, I am going to hold the pace and pick up the pace. No backing off.

Okay, so I hope to get back with you this weekend with a great race report- one that is full of that good kind of hurt where you know you have pushed it! Oh, and NO NO NO pictures of me smiling.