Warming Up To The Holidays

Let the holidays begin!  My favorite part about the Christmas season is seeing good, old, and even lost friends.  I try to rebel every year against Christmas (the commercialization and pressure to "buy things"), but I usually come out of my Grinchy shell a little bit when I have the chance to enjoy friends during the holidays.  Tonight I had the chance to social butterfly my way to three different parties.  

Party # 1- Frommage Fest 2009.  Wine and cheese...my favorite.  And boy, I haven't seen these girls in soooooo long!!!!  Good friends are meant to be seen often.  
Why does Laura always have to wear 6 inch heels to parties? ;)

Party #2- Some high school friends (my more studious friends....).  They could recall specific classroom incidents with tests and teachers.  Two of my friends could even regurgitate some long Latin paragraph they said we had to learn.  It was scary...I mean, that was 16 years ago!  Some things never change.   

And Party #3- more high school friends (my less studious friends!!!!)  We didn't have time to study our Latin in high school because we were too busy chasing boys!   :))))

I am looking forward to party hopping a little more next week as well.  

I somehow managed to catch a bug or cold or something from one of you on the internet- concluded by the fact that no one at work is sick, but I have heard grumblings hear and there from a few of you. So, here I am- 7:30 pm- ready for bed- drinking hot tea and honey and going through roll after roll of toilet paper.

As if I have real Kleenex at my house. You know I would never think to spend my money on that when I can blow snot rockets, use my sleeve, etc...

I did have some good mental highlights within the past few days. I read a really good Alan Smith interview this weekend about his sickening, devastating injury from a few years back (which robbed him of his best playing years) and how happy he is to still be playing, even at a lower level. The article gave me a bigger perspective on my measly injury. I would link some of the articles to you guys, but I know none of you care one bit about Alan Smith or premiership soccer. He is cute to look at, though. Soccer guys are my fave.

I also spent 2 hours at PT today (yes, 2...). I have a great PT/friend/fellow triathlete, Ashley, that really helps me use my own knowledge combined with her vast experience to figure things out. Tonight we decided to analyze my run a little bit since I have had some pain the past week and the emergence of other small problems.

We had a few hearty laughs at the fact that my knees were rubbing together when I ran. It could be the now 5 extra pounds I carry, but it is more likely some severe internal rotation from hip weakness. I have so much to focus on right now with strengthening and FORM! Injury + weakness = terrible form ->more injuries. So, we are sticking to super small runs with form focus.

And I wanted to lose those 5 pounds, but I ate pizza tonight instead. Tomorrow.

Again and Again

Do or do not- there is no try.  

Never, ever give up.  

The post-injury recovery is pretty tough mentally, as well as physically.  This has been my first week of pain and doubt (I am 5 weeks post sx).  I am working hard to get back into the swing of things, and I am having to challenge my mind to stay on top of the recovery as well.    

It just hit me yesterday how hard the process it- the recovery, the doubt, the work that I will have to do.  I freaked out in swim on Friday, it was just such a bad, bad swim.  I have been back to 5 master's practices, and I am just not ready for IM sets for time or for back to back hard swim classes.  My knee is not ready, I am not ready.  I was so hard on myself that day.  But, today is a new day and I am eager to get in the pool tomorrow and do the best that I can.  I have to be willing to do it again.  

Today I rode my bike for 45 minutes...at a 15mph average.  So, basically I am where I was when I first rode my bike 4 years ago.  Ughh, huh?  I know you feel my pain.  I came home mad and sad.  But, it is all part of the process- and poof, I will back on the bike tomorrow to try to figure it out.  What is it going to take?  What do I need to do?  When you lose control over the input=output, all you can do it work hard every day, regardless of the outcome.  

Of course the hardest has been the running.  1 minute 30 seconds is my limit right now.  Painful...??? not really painful.  Right???  no, not right.  Yet.  I hope.  So it is really about hope.  You know, if I tore my ACL in soccer, they would repair it and I would be running/playing again.  But my injury is a little more convoluted, it is a guessing game with no guarantees.  How do I fight that?  

By guaranteeing myself that I will work as much as I can on it and not focus on the future or outcomes I cannot control. 

So right now I cannot even think about racing.  I can't set goals like that.  I am setting goals to do my strength training, eat my vegetables, do something daily that will help me get fit, ride my bike no matter what the mph says, have gratitude for any amount of running I accomplish, and be willing to face weakness as many days/months/years as it takes to continue the journey.    

And like Kevin Leathers told me not too long ago (which I think about often because it is comforting)- he is still PRing in his 60s.  Just kidding, he is PRing at 45.  And he is a fellow soccer player, so I will actually listen to him.  

And just to stay competitive at something, I think I was the first bridesmaid to order both my dress and buy my shoes for Joy's wedding.  Go me!