A Very Tardy and Incomplete Preggo Journal #2

I can't believe I haven't posted while pregnant. I am going to have no pictures, and when my memory fades I won't be able to recall a dang thing!  Baby boy due in approx 7 weeks.  I hardly have any good pictures and didn't write anything down, so here is what I could find at 3am when I can't sleep due to pregnancy peeing, heartburn, and carpal tunnel syndrome.

9 weeks: I remember just feeling the normal first trimester awfulness.  I was counting every day and week getting out of the first trimester to lower my risk of another miscarriage.  My training load went way down, although I can't remember how much of it was conscious or just because I felt sick.  We were definitely excited to be pregnant again, and by 12 weeks we knew it would be a little boy.

14 weeks:  I don't have many pictures during this time, but here is one of me and Isla running.  So, I guess I was still trying to run!  Although I remember it was very hot and I had a feeling if Isla came with me we would not be running for too long.   Sure enough probably a quarter mile later we were picking flowers and walking when Isla decided it was too hot and she was too tired.  I was probably only jogging up to 2-3 miles at this time, and probably with plenty of walk breaks.

22 weeks:  I hated every minute of wearing a bathing suit on the beach.  I had to force myself to do it, and not be that self-conscious person.  But I struggled.  And I hate to admit this, but this is the best picture I could find.  Sorry I did that!  Trying to keep it real, but I didn't want to post everything hanging out.  I was not a cute looking pregnant woman on the beach. 22 weeks this time around is about my 34 week equivalent with my first pregnancy.  At 22 weeks I was just starting to stop all jogging due to the extra weight and discomfort, plus the constant 100+degree heat indexes.

But I did do daily crossfit with Dave at the beach, which is our yearly routine.  I am not a crossfit person, but on vacation I go with Dave so we can spend time together.  I actually worked hard in there, and I truly believe that having peers around you in your training can help.  Now if I could just actually find those peers here in Nola going forward...  

The elusive beach family picture- Isla is always too wiped out to really participate.

25 weeks:  This was my one of my only and last outdoor ride of 2019 so far!   The heat index was well over 100+ this day, even in the am, so I remember being so slow!  (but kind of happy to be on my bike, too :)

27 weeks:  I don't remember much about this time, except I have zero pictures and this one seems at such a weird angle.  I remember not being able to find anything to wear that fit me.

But, here is a pregnancy hack that works for me:  swimming helps me with the swelling quite a bit.  The day of the swim photo below, also 27 weeks, I could not put on my shorts or see a single bone in my foot/ankle joint.  After 30 minutes of swimming (term "swimming" used loosely but I am just trying to move), I was able to fully see my ankles and pull my shorts up.  The swelling has been real this time around!  Perhaps because I swam a ton when I was pregnant with Isla I did not have such a problem with swelling?  This time around I can count on two hands my swimming, mostly due to logistics of my work and the pool, but I am trying to make a more conscious effort to get in there 1-2 times a week going forward to help with everything.  

28 weeks:  Most of my exercise, if I am able to do any, has to happen after 7pm.  I usually get home from work anywhere around 5:30-6:00, and after being on my feet all day at the hospital, I am usually so swollen I just sit down and elevate them.  I try to stay motivated to get out and walk in the evening anywhere from 45-60 minutes, but I am definitely not making it happen as much.  Early pregnancy I was at about a 14-15 min/mile clip.  By 28 weeks more like a 17 min/mile clip.  Every now and then I think to jog a little bit during my walks, but then I remember it doesn't feel good and I can just run post baby and enjoy it.  

29 weeks:  Made it to Memphis for a class reunion with my PT friends.  I was also sick with a respiratory infection I just could not kick, and that has probably been the worst part of pregnancy.   

Also- 29 weeks:  This is a FAKE NEWS picture.  I took this and thought, well, now I know why everyone looks so amazing on instagram.  I look "smaller" at 29 weeks than I did at 22 at this angle.  I have developed some better guard rails over the years for my social media intake, which has helped during this pregnancy.  I still have the urge to compare myself to the gals that run marathons throughout pregnancy or maintain their athletic figure with a tiny baby bump, but I work hard to manage it and continue to be grateful for everything I have, which doesn't necessarily have a lot to do with athletics right now. 

31 weeks:  Heading out the door for a PT meeting.  I regretted those shoes 30 minutes later.  

32 weeks:  Can't really see anything due to the darkness of this picture, but I still try to have a tiny social life.  I was able to hang for about 4 hours at the #PussyFooters Pub Prance before taking my swollen cankles home.  

I will try to take some more pictures in these last final weeks.  This pregnancy has been very different from my first pregnancy, but I think a lot of it has to do with the fact that I already have responsibilities as a mother, and my work load has significantly increased.  I have had more fatigue and swelling and not once did I go to prenatal yoga this time around, where as last time I went several times a week.  Life is just different.

Mostly I am looking forward to running and cycling again!  This is the most significant and true amount of time I have taken off, and I think the challenge for me to return to sport will be very hard indeed.  I am going to have a lot of weight to lose, muscle to gain, and skeletal integrity to make happen.  It will be a good challenge :)

And I will finish up with my favorite picture thus far with pregnancy- Isla and Sullivan hugging baby boy :)  This picture makes me so happy!!!!

Running Kid

I have heard the following so many times:  "I wish I could get my kid to run!"  "My kid doesn't like to run."  "My kid is lazy"  (odd, but true.  I have heard that one as well!)

Here is the start of my daughter's journey running starting at 4 years of age, as told by her mother.  Her account may differ, but this is my blog :)

At age 4, she was not interested in running.  (and not really interested in soccer or any sports).  If I tried to get her to run a block or two with me, she would say she was tired within 25 yards.  She just wasn't into it.  It didn't matter than mom was a runner.  There was no game I could play to spark her interest.  (And why was I even trying?  Because I firmly believe we can plant the seeds in youngsters that they ARE runners.  They ARE athletes.  Even if it is tough for them, or they are the slowest, or it doesn't come naturally.  The earlier we have the esteem that we can do something, the earlier we get to enjoy the wonderful sport of running!)

The thing is, some kids are REALLY into it!  Even at age 2 or 3!  I have friends with kids like that- 3 year olds running sub 10 min miles-kids that are athletically driven from a very early age.  But I truly believe that does not need to be the normal spring board for anyone to become the runner they are meant to be.  And I believe, whether you are a kid or an adult, we can ALL become ATHLETES.  It is inside of us, regardless of when we start.  We can't be intimidated by someone else's journey or discouraged if ours takes a different or longer path. 

 So, to make it fun and engaging for Isla, here is what I did.

1.  I signed us up for a race series with kids events.  The distances were 1/2 mile to 1 mile.  I felt 1 mile would be too long for her, but we committed to doing the bet we could.  

2.  And I ran with her!  I held her hand at first for almost the entire race.  Over time we would pick segments where I would hold her hand (the start and finish) and times she would just run and think about swinging her arms.  Now we don't hold hands at all, but we run together still.  

3.  We have a running philosophy and goals for every race.  Here is a sample of what we discuss pre-race as we drive there:

-  I am so happy to be spending my morning with you!  Isn't this awesome to have mommy-daughter special mornings, just the two of us?  

-  We are so lucky to run!  And we get to see the beautiful trees and breathe in the oxygen.  I hope we get to see some animals today!  

- Let's make sure to encourage everyone out there!  Maybe we can even make a new friend today!

- It's okay to want to win.  It is also okay to come in last.  Our goal is to do our very best.  Sometime we have good days and sometimes not so great.  The most important thing is we are going to have a POSITIVE ATTITUDE no matter what.  

- Let's try to be a little bit faster than before!  But if we aren't faster that is okay.  Let's try to run the whole way.  But it is okay if we have to walk.  If we walk, let's stay positive and try to run again when we can.  Oh, an when we see the finish line, let's run as fast as we can through it! 

- Sometimes running can be tough and maybe even be uncomfortable!  But we are okay and can practice pushing through it.  

So through this journey of almost a year, I have a runner that really enjoys our races.  Sometimes (but very rarely) she will run a little bit on her own for "practice."  But she really looks forward to race day.  During and after races now, she tells me how much fun she is having.  We look for animals while we race.  We thank the trees.  We encourage other runners.  We laugh.  

We also talk about pacing.  Staying steady.  Passing people.  Trying to not let people pass us.  One of our rules is it is okay to race.  It is okay to be competitive.  This is something I believe can be taught. We can be fierce and gracious at the same time.

Sometimes Isla wins something.  Sometimes she doesn't.  She is in the fortunate position to be in the 5 and under category for another couple of months, which is a small category.  But starting in July she will be racing the 9 year olds.  So, awards may be few or none at all for a while.  Better love the journey!!!!!!!!!

And running is not just about times, PRs, and awards.  It is about friends.  It is about feeding the turtles.  It is about loving life.  

I hope some of these ideas help you get going with your own kid.  If you need any ideas, I am happy to help.  If you are in the area, come and run a race with Isla and I!  

14th Anniversary

Last night was a little 14th Anniversary dinner with my hubby.  14 years doesn't seem that long, but when we total up 20 years in a relationship together it does start to blow the mind that we have been together almost as long in life as we were not together.  Love you, hon!

A Little Rant, Facebook Is Dead To Me, Back to Blogging

I had this grand plan after last post to start posting every Wednesday while Isla was at gymnastics.   I brought my computer with me, ready to blog away, and for the next month the internet was down at the gym.  Foiled again!

Last night, for not the first time but probably the last, I got rid of Facebook.  (well, you can find me on there, but it is gone from my devices). I have managed to maintain an account for the past few years even though I am liking the space less and less.  I feel tied to it, mainly because every event myself or my daughter gets invited to comes through a Facebook event invitation.  So, I have taken it off of my phone, only to put it back on when I kept missing events or notices I thought were important.

But, last night I had it.  Since 2016, it has been the political posts that have flattened me mostly.  I have so much to say on this, but don't even know how to put it into words.  Mostly I just get tired of the meanness.  I get tired of the people that think they know it all.  I get tired of the propaganda.

Finally, the mean posts, memes, "calling out," criticism.... it just got to me last night.  I was literally up all night over the stress of it.  Yesterday I was playing on my phone it was just a feed full of people mad at parents that are "anti-vax."  (I have been seeing so many crappy threads out there for months now, but one person that finally broke my back- she was also the person that has never had kids but posted years ago a fat shaming post for pregnant women).  Reality, most people aren't anti-vax, they just question the current profit driven system.  Since I have worked with vaccine injured kids (yes, that is a thing.  Not common, but it does exist) for over a decade now as a physical therapist, I have studied this a lot and worked with people of all walks of life and levels of education on this topic- from moms that know more than I will ever know because their research is extensive, to pediatricians who have individualized care, to people that actually lobby in DC.  I certainly have an opinion, and I am discovering that 99% of my friends want to hate me because I have some critical thought.  A lot of critical thought- thank gosh for my liberal college education!

I get mad at things in this world too!  I get mad at my friend that promotes an industry that is incredibly cruel to animals. You guys know that eats me alive.  But I don't go post a bunch of shit on Facebook.  I respect her as a person with a heart and a family.  She hasn't come to me for advice, nor is she looking for a career change.  And maybe she is doing the best she can in her space.  So while I want to sometimes attack and sometimes just unfollow her because I have those feelings too, the reality is we have to live in this world with friends that don't always see eye to eye with us.  And we aren't going to change them through Facebook.  But maybe with love and kind examples we may plant seeds in people.  I think it truly is the only way.

So here is what it has boiled down to for me:

I don't want your USA Today post or Huff Post or whatever else has fired you up spouted off as life fact.  I don't want it thrown at me from your pulpit.  Mainly, I don't want to read a bunch of your angry stuff that is.....

BULLYING!

And that is what it has come down to.  People get upset or fired up about a topic, then go on facebook/twitter and decimate "friends" in their wake of righteousness.  And I just can't take it anymore.

Because every time you post an opinion piece or link an article about your politics, or how you hate parents that make different choices than you (and maybe even know more than you, but it is hard to consider that when you are so into Facebook you can't see through the bull), you are hurting people.  It is true.  It is our new form of being a "mean girl" or a bully, and we can now do it at any age and to any person.  None of us get together and talk in person.  We don't educate each other.  We just preach.

PREACH SISTA!

I am done! I just can't take it.

You probably don't know more than other people.  Your opinion doesn't matter more.  You are not more right.  And that is a fact.  And I just can't take it anymore.  Did I say that already?  About 5 times.

So, I am back to blogging- exclusively I think.  I remember loving to read blogs.  We talked about training, racing, and the mental side to life.  We celebrated birthdays and new pregnancies.  We would "Make It Happen," and through reading others push to victory, we all thought we could do it too.  It is just a more positive space.  Facebook gone.  Twitter gone!  I will have no access to my "instant news" now, but I also won't have to listen to everyone's newly found power to just be an a-hole without repercussion.  And I may even maintain some friendships because after last night 50% were on the chopping block. (the other problem with Facebook- we are losing our ability as humans to develop in person- by voice/phone- real friendships.  Because we see a picture of someone's kid, we think we know what is going on in their life.

So if you want to reach me, call me!  Email me!  I will do a better job of updating this space with my real thoughts.  I won't talk politics or mom shaming, because that is just not me.  But I will do my best to create some more space on the internet that is positive, creative, and allows us to think and grow with love.

So what is new with me for real?

Isla and I kicked off her Grand Prix Running Series for 2019.  She beat her 1/2 mile time by about 43 seconds from last year.  Not that she know what that means or cares!  And she called me her coach, which you know I just ate up!!!!  Love love love!!!!

One thing I think that makes me a fun mom and "coach" is  during the race at the turn around point we talked about feeling the wind on our back when we had a tail wind and flying like an eagle.  You know, life is really fun!  I want her to think of being an eagle when she is older and feeling the wind on her body- just proud of all her body can do for her.

That little tiny speck on the right of the path is Isla.  The funny thing is, for the first time ever, she just left me the other day when we were walking the dogs.  She decided to go running, and she ran maybe 3/4 of a mile on her own.  She has NEVER done that, even for a quarter of a mile.  We don't even practice for her run races because she doesn't want to.  She runs one time a month at her race and that is it.  I honestly couldn't even catch her for the first time ever- it was such a cool moment.

I was a handler for the #pussyfooters this year in a couple of Mardi Gras parades.  That was a lot of fun- a bit hard to explain if you don't live down here.  But, everything in good fun- tongue in cheek- women just loving life.  

No great family picture for Mardi Gras this year, but we were out there.  We have had so many visitors in the past 2 months, we can't hardly catch our breath.  But that is life in the Big Easy- it is really the Big Busy!